Nicki’s Note: What I’m Not Trying To Change In 2019

Forget resolutions. I know a lot of people can relate to this sentiment—I’ve never seen so many “no resolution!” posts in my Instagram feed like I did this past year. It’s the quickest way to mainline a shot of cortisol (the stress hormone): Here’s what I’m not doing enough of, I’ve got to hunker down, I need to commit, I have to do this. It is nice to look at a new year like a blank slate, a perfect pristine canvas that you can color with whatever shades strike your fancy.

But then the realization that you are not actually a blank canvas, you’re you. With all sorts of you’isms baked in. Instead of trying to change something, this year I’m trying to maintain the things I love about life right now. So in no particular order, here’s what I’m not trying to change in 2019 (if anything I want to indulge in these things generously and with abandon).

• Enjoying live music. After two kids, I really took a break from the religious experience of seeing a band I love perform live. This year my husband and I purchased tickets like we were 17 again, getting to shows as much as we could and enjoying every minute of them. I’m never as present to myself as I am in these moments.
• Forgiving myself for loving work. I love what we do at Doddle & Co. It’s hard to not want to nurture this company constantly—and yet as a woman I’m always conflicted by this. Should I love work this much? Is it wrong that sometimes I choose work instead of curling up and watching a movie? Or immersing myself in a good book? Finally I’m answering that with a resounding, “Nope.”

Co-founders of Doddle & Co: Janna Badger and Nicki Radzley

• Surrounding myself with people who fill me up. It isn’t easy to find people who feed your soul but when you do, hold on tight and make time for them. Call them when you miss them or visit them if you want to see them. I leaned heavily on these people this year.
• Allowing life to do its thing. For every wonderful thing that happened this year, something somewhere decided to try and balance that joy out. The highs were high and the lows were low. Of course I want to jump in and course correct when things go wrong, but after months of these extremes I’m trying to observe life’s vicissitudes instead of fight them.
• Caring for myself. This one has become big for me and might be the biggest of all. Doing things with intention, whether that’s making a cup of tea or pouring myself a glass of wine, has changed the game for me. I think about why, how and what would heighten the experience so that it makes me most fulfilled and it’s made my days far better.

Talk to me: What are you trying not to change this year? I’d love to hear. Xx Nicki